Psychotic Episode 8: Aftermath
by Glod
Summary: The fallout from any adventure can be its own trouble.
1. Pain

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the Justice League/ JLU

**Pyschotic**

**Pain**

Wonder Woman leaned closer to the console Batman was working on. If he wasn't going to appreciate her bountiful curves and glowing skin then she'd impress him with her cunning and intellect instead. Not to say that she'd want a man to only like her for her looks, but life would be so much easier if he'd just be _normal_ and do so! Or at least a _compliment_! She had men sending enough fan mail to bury a horse every day, and this fool didn't even look twice!

"So if we factor in the fact that whoever is behind all this has access to space technology, we narrow the list to just one!" Bruce's voice broke in on Diana's preoccupation.

"Yes, of course!" Diana agreed, having no idea what Bruce was on about. "And who is it?"

Batman frowned at her. "It's on the screen."

"Yes! I knew that!" Diana leaned toward the screen, letting her hair fall forward to cover her face. Damn the man for distracting her!

---

"Oh God, it hurts!"

_You will insist on controlling the body. _

"Take it. It's yours. I don't want it."

_Uh, well, right now's not a good time for me…_

"Wake Psychotic up. I don't care. Make it stop!"

_I think we can pretty much write Psychotic off for the next couple of days. _

"Just five minutes. Take over for just five minutes."

_No really. I'm fine. _

"I hate you."

---

"So, you think it's this Gered Corack? Who is he?" Diana scanned the information listed on the screen.

"He's one of the richest men alive. For the last twenty years he's been building up GC Enterprises. He has interests in all aspects of technology, from software and games to space technology. He could be richer than Lex Luthor. I've met him before. He seems honest, but he's the only man who could afford and organize this sort of thing." Batman replied.

"Couldn't it be Lex Luthor himself?" Diana asked.

"We don't know where Lex is, but he's no longer at the head of Luthor Corp, we know that much. The last we saw of him he disappeared with Darkseid. Corack is the only other man with the resources, except for me, of course."

"Of course." Diana echoed, dryly. "But why would Corack be doing this?"

"I don't know."

---

"Don't they stock like morphine or something up here? Where is the morphine?"

_Uh, really, I couldn't tell you. Maybe you should call for someone and ask._

"Hello? Hello? Is anybody out there?"

_I meant, use the buzzer. _

"Smart ass."

---

"Corack acquired a weapons development company five years ago, and the Question uncovered some off-the-books links between some of his subsidiary security companies and some mercenaries in the last two years."

"So you think that's where he got his 'army'?" Diana asked.

"It's likely. The mercenary company they've been most in contact with is best known for its welcome of powered soldiers. They've had contracts with Atomic Skull in the past, and they'd be in the best position to locate and use a teleporter."

"Which would account for the attack on the convoy and the coordination with super-beings, but what about some of the other crises? Bank robberies, plane hijackings, satellite sabotage?"

"Corack's mercenaries have far-reaching contacts in many cities across the country. For the right price, they could get coordinated enough to hit them all at similar times. The hijacking occurred in an airline company owned by GC Enterprises, and a lot of the satellite in question's parts came from various companies that are ultimately owned by GC Enterprises. There's some well hidden link between GC Enterprises and every crises we've seen. It's complicated, but possible."

"Where would he get kryptonite?" Diana asked.

Batman just gave her a look. Diana sighed. That look did not say 'I strongly respect your intelligence and cunning'. In fact, that look most definitely said 'duh'.

---

"Why is nobody answering the buzzer?"

_You buzzed it three seconds ago. Give them some time._

"But it hurts! It hurts so much! I just want some morphine! Is that too much to ask?"

_You know, there's no guarantee they stock anything that strong._

"I would settle for half a gram of paracetemol if that's all they've got. Anything that's a proven painkiller will do. I'll even go for some Russian anesthetic if that's all they've got."

_Russian anesthetic?_

"A great big hammer applied with force to my head."

---

"Why would Corack want to discredit the Justice League?" Diana leaned back in her chair and contemplated the dark haired man smiling out of the newspaper picture from the clip on the screen.

Batman shrugged one shoulder. "He doesn't seem to have ever had any sort of interaction with the Justice League. His public image is that of the 'good, honest businessman'. He helps charities; he's a substantial donator to the Gates and Rockefeller Foundations. He has no wife, no family; his fortune is willed to charity, and he seems to be grooming younger protégés from within the company to take over on his retirement."

"That's his public image." Diana pointed out. "What about his personal life?"

"The Question looked into it. There doesn't seem to be any contradiction between how he acts in public and anything that's known about his private life. The only oddity is how quiet it's been kept..."

"How quiet what's been kept?"

"Well, nineteen years ago he was caught in the middle of a fight in Central City between Superman and some armed bank robbers. He was only bruised up a bit and knocked out, but his wife wasn't so lucky. She was 8 months pregnant and took a stray bullet to the head. They were taken to the same hospital, where she died four hours later, long enough for them to deliver the child. But there was some sort of electrical disturbance, the hospital had a black out. When they got everything back online the baby was dead. Corack woke thirty-six hours later having lost his wife and his child. The Question only found out about it because he picked up an article on the incident where they quoted Corack's name. Corack has concentrated solely on building his empire ever since, and has never mentioned it."

"The poor man." Diana murmured.

"It's odd, though." Bruce added musingly.

"What is?"

"The hospital records say the baby died, but that no body was released to the father. They say he didn't want it. But there's no record of a coroner being called in, or a body being processed for burial by the hospital either. The Question thought it was strange."

"But is it important?" Diana asked.

Bruce shrugged.

---

"Oh I can't believe this. I am actually going to have to get up…"

_Well, you could just lie there really still and stop moaning._

"You want this body for a bit? Do you? Why don't you try out this pain for two minutes, and _then_ you can tell me to stop moaning!"

_It's amazing how much the magic takes out of us physically, isn't it?_

"Amazing? It's a pain in the - "

_Hey look, someone's outside!_

"And why is there a picture window on a damned infirmary room?"

---

"So he could just be out for revenge." Diana suggested.

"Twenty years later?" Bruce asked.

Diana shrugged. "He's a hugely successful businessman. Obviously he knows how to be patient and bide his time. And what better way than to bring down the organization that Superman has worked so hard to build up?"

"It seems likely." Bruce agreed.

"So now we have to figure out what he's going to try next."

"I think we've got some time. A little less than we had before, but I don't think he can move to the next stage in the next few days, which is good. We're going to need Psychotic up and active again before he does. He thinks she's dead, so once again she's going to be our surprise element."

Diana frowned. She'd never been particularly happy with Psychotic's being on the Watchtower, or being part of the Justice League, but it looked like she'd been wrong about her. The girl was proving to be very useful. Even Superman was rethinking his opinion of her. Her power was undeniable.

Batman saved his data, pushed away from the console and stood up. "I'll get the Question to look into this and see if he can't find anything that'll give us a clue about what Corack's planning. Meanwhile, uh…"

Diana looked up expectantly. Bruce was looking down at her as if he'd only just noticed her and he seemed… uncomfortable. She felt a smile tug at the corner of her mouth.

"I've got work to do." He snapped and turned on his heel.

Diana just settled back in her chair and grinned.

---

_Hey it's the Flash! Finally! Some decent company!_

"Decent company? You call the Flash decent company? He's a - "

_Hush. He's coming in. _


	2. Thoughts

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the Justice League/ JLU

**Pyschotic**

**Thoughts**

"What the hell were you thinking?"

_OK, where does this guy think he got the right to be angry at me over anything? Well you know what he can do? I'll tell you what he can do. He can go f – _

_It is odd to hear you swear so profusely, Jay._

_Psychotic! You're up! That's a lot earlier than expected…_

_It seems it is possible to become accustomed to having all the energy drained out of oneself. _

"Do you know how much danger you put yourself in? You could have _died_ out there! Do you even realize how irresponsible it was of you to go out there with no back up into what was obviously a trap?"

_All I'm saying is that he has no business standing there acting like he's Mr. Lord Almighty and can be all like "you're an idiot" when you know what? He's the idiot! IDIOT! That's what he is! And have I mentioned that he can go f – _

_Psychotic help me out here. She's being ridiculous. She's refusing to talk to Flash- well, you can hear for yourself._

_It does appear that this Flash is lecturing Jay. I must agree with her- it does not seem entirely appropriate. _

_Pysch__, old pal, dear friend. You need to help me out. These people already think we're crazy. It's no good if she just sits here fuming and refuses to talk to one of them. _

"Are you even listening to me? We made you a full member of the Justice League because we trust you, and that means you're supposed to act like an adult, not like some child who just goes rushing into danger without thinking things through!"

_Are you listening to this? ARE YOU LISTENING TO THIS? This guy is a piece of work, that's what I'm saying. Do you hear what I'm telling you? Do you hear what this crackpot is saying? The FLASH is telling ME that I need to be more responsible? This from the guy who ignores suffering orphans in his own city? HAH! That's all I'm saying- HAH! He can go f – _

_Might I suggest that you simply take over the body? Then you could respond to __Flash__ until Jay calms down._

_Ok, a) don't know if you noticed, but there's still a lot of pain floating around. I'm not that worried. And b) even if I wanted to I couldn't. Jay's got __herself__ so worked up __that it would take a lot for me to wrest control off her. Maybe you could do it? _

"And to go to the _moon_? Did you completely lose your mind? What if you'd lost consciousness? You didn't even take a spacesuit- even Superman takes a spacesuit! What if your shield had dropped? You think we want to see your body matter splattered across the cosmos?"

_Now he's pretending to care? NOW he wants to start caring? For nineteen years he couldn't give a damn and now he wants to start caring? This guy is a piece of work, a real psycho piece of work and I have three people in my head so I know what I'm talking about when I call someone psycho and this damn fool is more psycho than the craziest person out there and he can just go and f – _

_I cannot gain control. Jay is… enraged. I have never seen her so agitated, and I have not regained my full energy. At this moment she is the strongest of us. _

_Which means we're stuck listening to her rant? _

_It appears so. _

"And to not even leave any kind of message about where you were, or communicate with anyone! Why exactly do you think we even have a communications system? Do you think you're so good that you don't need to let people know when you might be in danger? Do you really think you can get yourself out of anything? I knew you were confident, but even Superman couldn't be that confident. Do you even understand the concept of teamwork?"

_I didn't leave a message? Is it my fault he's mentally challenged? Leaving the co-ordinates and the alert all flagged up wasn't enough? What did __he__ want, a freaking gorilla-gram or something? __A singing dancing information clown?__ Yeah that seems about the right age range for this dimwit! The hypocrite, acting like he's been all worried. Worried? HAH! The Flash wouldn't know worried if it bit him in the face! He can go f –_

_Hey, how bad could this be? She's got to run out of steam soon, right? _

"Are you even listening? Don't you have anything to say for yourself, or are you going to just sit there and glare at me? Yeah, that's real mature!"

_Oh now he's calling me immature? HE is calling ME immature? I'm being called immature by the King of Idiots himself? This is rich, this is just so rich! He can go f – _

_I mean, now you're out Psychotic, there shouldn't be any harm in her getting this angry, right? _

"And you can stop looking like you don't deserve a good telling off! There was absolutely no reason for you to put yourself in danger this time round! Unless you were after some glory, trying to catch out the bad guy- well there's no place for grandstanding in the Justice League, and you ought to know that by now!"

_This guy! This guy! This guy! A real piece of work, this guy! No grandstanding? NO GRANDSTANDING? Like everyone in the entire Justice League doesn't do it like every day? Where does he get off telling me I shouldn't be doing my job? MY JOB! It's my job! Some superhero he is, that's all I'm going to say, the f –_

_I do not see that there is any danger of Jay being angry. Except that it is strange to see her so. _

_Yeah. Here's hoping. If he keeps this up she's going to go nuts. _

_In so far as I understand your definition of 'nuts', I believe Jay overstepped that line some time ago. _

"I just hope you've learnt your lesson from all this, and won't be doing anything this stupid again!"

"Why you stupid stuck-up son of a – OW!"

_It appears I was wrong. There seems to have been a danger in Jay getting so worked up._

_Don't beat yourself up about it Psych. There was no way you could predict she'd attempt to jump out of bed to have a good yell at Flash. _

_I do not foresee any good coming of this. _

_Well Psych, you try falling on your face in front of someone you're angry at and see how much that calms you down. _

_I propose that we make a… strategic retreat. _

_Couldn't agree with you more, Psych old pal._


	3. Psychology

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the Justice League/ JLU

**Pyschotic**

**Psychology**

Jay pushed herself up off the floor with a groan, trying to ignore Flash's hand on her shoulder where he was steadying her. She was far too furious to want to be anywhere near this idiot, but if she was being honest, it hurt way too much to shrug his hand off.

"Are you ok?" Flash was kneeling on the floor beside her, his previous angry-dad act forgotten in his apparent worry for her health. Jay still wasn't buying it.

"Get off me!" Jay ground out, irritated that she couldn't back up her order by pushing him away. It was all she could do to keep herself propped up on her arms, but she wasn't going to admit that lest he touch her even more while trying to help her up.

"You don't look like you could stay upright on your own." Flash responded, nevertheless removing his hand and standing up. Jay breathed a sigh of relief- too soon, it seemed, as Flash moved behind her, knelt down and just picked her up.

"Put me down! I'm mad at you!" Jay snarled, wincing at how childish she sounded.

"Tough." Flash retorted, depositing her back on the infirmary bed. Jay lay back limply, hating that she was in such a vulnerable position, and really hating how much time she seemed to spend in the damn infirmary. She closed her eyes, trying to block out her irritation. Trying to pretend she wasn't humiliated.

Flash moved back to his original position at the end of the bed. Jay heard him fold his arms across his chest, the rustle of costume fabric loud in the otherwise silent room. She could just imagine him glaring down at her again, preparing to take up his tirade where he'd left off. She didn't want to open her eyes and face it. She hated him. That was it, she hated him and she just wanted him to go away.

They stayed that way, the room ruled by silence, until Jay couldn't hack it any more. She cracked one eye open and glared at Flash out of it.

"If you're quite finished, maybe you could just leave?" Jay couldn't believe she could sound like such a… brat. She sounded like a spoiled brat. Ironic, since spoiled was the last thing anyone could ever call her. But she couldn't seem to help herself. Her options were to act childish and irritable or… she didn't want to think about the alternative.

Flash barely reacted. His frown deepened slightly, and his jaw clenched again. "I'm not going anywhere until you at least acknowledge that you made a mistake."

Jay's head snapped up, her anger letting her ignore the ache that caused in her neck. "It wasn't a mistake. It was an opportunity to find out who's behind all this!"

"You nearly died."

"If it had been Superman, you wouldn't be here. If it had been Hawkgirl, you wouldn't be here!"

"You're not Superman. And you're not Hawkgirl."

"They still would have done the same thing! You would have done the same thing!" Jay hated that she had to defend herself. She shouldn't feel the need to. Not to this man.

"We're experienced. You've had one month on the job and you've barely had any real world exposure in that time. You could have died!"

"I know! You think I don't know?" Her voice wobbled on the last world, and Jay clenched her teeth to keep any more words from spilling out. Or worse, any tears from spilling out. The last thing she needed was pity. Especially not from Flash.

Too late. His stance relaxed, and he took a step to the side as if to come around the bed, but stopped himself. "You didn't need to put yourself in that much danger."

"I'm a member of the Justice League!" Jay snapped. "That's the whole point- putting yourself in danger to save other people!"

"Who were you saving?"

"I… we need to know who's targeting us!"

"And how was walking into a trap going to help?"

"It might have!"

"Might have? So you learnt nothing?"

Jay clamped her jaw shut again. That was what was killing her- she'd nearly died, she'd put herself in danger, had acted without back up, and she hadn't learnt anything at all. Worse, she hadn't been able to help herself. All that damn training, and when push came to shove all she managed to do was keep herself alive long enough to be saved by someone else.

"If I had learnt something, you wouldn't be here lecturing me about danger! You'd be praising me for what I'd found out! I had to try!"

"That's where you're wrong." Flash stepped back, his tone dead serious. "I'd still be here, and I'd still be furious. You… you're too young to die."

"And Stargirl isn't? She's even younger than I am!" Jay ground out, frustrated at the unfairness.

"Stargirl… has nothing to do with anything!" Flash snapped. "We're talking about you taking foolish risks!"

"And who died and put you in charge?" Jay yelled, forgetting her exhaustion. "What I do is none of your business! What I do is nobody's business! I don't have anyone! It's just me and I can do whatever the hell I want, you got that?"

"You're part of the Justice League now – "

"No! I'm Psychotic! We're Psychotic! We're just some crazy nut job kid you all have to take care of! Everyone looks at us like we're some bomb about to explode, and nobody wants us here or anywhere! So don't you start pretending that you care what happens to us. Don't you dare."

"I do care – "

"No! No you don't!"

"What is going on here?"

Jay and Flash both looked across to the doorway where J'onn stood, a concerned frowned marring his features. Neither of them had heard J'onn come in, so caught up were they in their argument. Flash took a step back, Jay took a deep calming breath. She had to get some control. She had to get some space. She just wanted to give up the body and go hide in the back of her mind for a while…

Come to think on it, she hadn't been hearing the usual orchestra of voices in the last few minutes…

_Hey, where did you two go? Jay? __Psychotic?_

_Uh, we're here. Just thought we'd let you figure stuff out for a while. _

_I do not think we were expecting quite that… outburst. _

_And the understatement of the year award goes to Psychotic! Applause and celebration, want to come up and claim your prize? _

"Perhaps we should leave Jay to rest, Flash." J'onn said, when no response was forthcoming from either Jay or Flash. Flash didn't even bother to reply, but simply nodded and walked out of the infirmary room. J'onn stepped closer to the bed where Jay lay. "Are you alright?" J'onn asked.

Jay nodded and settled back into the bed, welcoming the surge of pain now that her anger was currently derailed. It gave her something else to think about for a while.

"I shall check on you later. If you need to talk…" J'onn left the sentence unfinished, his offer floating in the silence that had descended on the room. Jay closed her eyes, her only answer.

Without another word, J'onn left.

---

J'onn caught up to Flash as he strode to the control room, miraculously maintaining a normal person's speed.

"You seem disturbed." J'onn stated.

Flash snorted his agreement, but didn't say anything.

"Is it something that should concern us?" J'onn asked, apparently the wrong thing to say because Flash turned on him in fury.

"That's the problem, isn't it? I don't know, J'onn! I don't know what's going through her head! You're the psychologist, not me!"

"Perhaps you would like to discuss it?"

"Yes I would." Flash sighed, glancing around at the relatively busy corridor. "Maybe somewhere a little more private?"

J'onn nodded and led Flash to one of the meeting rooms they were just passing. The rooms were dotted all around the watchtower, available for either social gatherings or more serious meetings. Luckily the closest one was empty, and J'onn locked the door when he and Flash were inside.

Flash barely waited for the doors to swish shut. "She's just so messed up J'onn! She refuses to believe that anyone could care for her, she takes crazy risks, and I swear she thinks everyone wants her gone!"

"She has never been wanted before, Flash. This is a problem with many of your foster children, and especially for Jay. She was an uncontrolled magician moved from home to home- she does not appear to have had an easy time."

"That's an understatement!" Flash laughed cynically, causing J'onn to frown in concern. "I don't know why, but it's like she blames me. What did I ever do to her?"

J'onn shrugged. "She was living in Central City. This is an issue that has been… previously mentioned. She seems to have some misplaced idea that you, the Central City hero, should have noticed and interceded."

"How? I can't possibly keep tabs on every foster kid in Central City to make sure they're ok. I wish I could! But even I can't be that many places at once!"

"I know Flash. It is not your fault. Placing blame is a way she found to cope- she was likely looking for any reason she could find to avoid blaming herself. It is just bad luck, for you."

"I feel responsible." Flash murmured, leaning dejectedly against the table, his eyes fixed firmly on the table top. J'onn walked around the table to place a reassuring hand on Flash's shoulder.

"Do not. You carry no blame, and you have accepted her more readily than anyone else in the Justice League. You must let her have time to adjust- she has not been with us long enough to be sure of her place here yet, and the time she has spent here has been complicated. Perhaps…"

"Perhaps what?" Flash asked, looking up hopefully at J'onn's thoughtful tone.

"It does not matter. I shall do my best to ensure she settles in as quickly as possible. It would be useful to put her back as coordinator, since she enjoys it. Do not worry Flash."

Flash held silent for a moment, then sighed resignedly. He shut his eyes briefly, and when he looked up again his customary grin was firmly in place. J'onn felt a light breeze as Flash zipped over to the flower vase in the corner and returned in a blink to J'onn, offering him a bloom from the arrangement.

"Well that's a relief J'onn! Being the serious guy is so not my thing!" Still grinning Flash sauntered out of the room, whistling a determinedly cheerful tune.

J'onn was not entirely convinced.


	4. Depression

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the Justice League/ JLU

**Pyschotic**

**Depression**

Jay frowned at the console. She was seated in the control room, acting coordinator for the day shift this week. It'd taken her about three days to be able to even stand up for longer than it took to go to the bathroom, but as soon as she could convince J'onn she was healthy again she'd been back in here. He'd insisted she take day shift, and was keeping tabs on her to make sure she wasn't overdoing it, but at least he was letting her work. There was absolutely no way he'd let her do any groundwork, insisting she needed to rest. Coordinating was keeping her busy enough, and had been for the two weeks since she'd been better.

_He is correct in assuming we need it._

Jay scowled at the computer screen. Since when was Psychotic the voice of reason?

_Since you lost all claim to reasonable thought. _

Jay scowled harder. For some reason, her other self and Psychotic were ganging up on her this last week. Ever since she'd woken up in the infirmary they seemed on some sort of sadistic mission to psychoanalyze her every thought.

_Because you need to think a whole bunch of things through._

_Inexperienced as I am, even I acknowledge that restraining your feelings is not healthy._

_It's called 'bottling up' Psychotic. Seriously, you have got to start talking like a normal person. _

Jay glared at the screen, studiously ignoring the voices in her head. It wasn't as if what she was studying wasn't fascinating- Batman's file on this Gered Corack man. It seemed her hideously botched moon mission had at least giving Batman the information he needed to narrow the suspects down to this one multi-gadzillionaire.

_'Botched moon mission.'__ Come on now, I don't think it was all that bad! _

_It is true, Jay. It was a reasonable course of action._

_Yeah, Flash was just being… well, overprotective, really._

_Both of you shut up and concentrate. _

_Concentrate on what? You've read this file six times over. Which is overkill for someone with a photographic memory, can I just point out? _

Jay sighed and scrolled down the list of Corack's assets. He really was a brilliant businessman. Oddly there weren't any decent pictures of the guy, he seemed to really hate the press.

_Shame about his baby._

Jay grunted something non-committal.

In the back of her mind Jay could just _feel_ her other self and Psychotic exchange worried thoughts. She didn't want to think about it, because if she had to face her feelings… well, it was a pansy thing to do anyway. She was the one in control, who didn't have feelings, and she liked things that way.

_Seriously girl, that is not healthy at all. I know you spent the first 18 years of your life avoiding feelings, but that was back when it was actually mortally dangerous for you to have them. And anyway, you _never_ felt like this…_

Shame it was such a slow day in the world. No major natural disasters, no daring bank robberies, no crises… nothing at all to distract her from her own thoughts.

_See? You've never been afraid of just thinking before! _

Jay just sighed. What she wouldn't give to just… go blank. She so badly wanted the world to just stop for a while, and let her stop with it. Just, just, just. That's all she wanted. Just a little bit of nothingness. Just nothing.

_I would like to voice my concerns at this junction. _

_I am so behind you on this one Psychotic._

_How can you be behind me? We are in the same head._

_Seriously Psych, we need to work on you__r__ literalism. _

_I am not certain that that is a word. _

_Psych, it's a word. __Seriously.__ I've typed it into __the word processor before and it didn't make a little squiggly red line beneath it. _

_I do not understand. _

_You never do. _

Jay let the bickering fade into the background, concentrating on the nothingness of the middle distance, trying to pretend there were no voices. Trying to make them disappear…

_Whoa! Hold up! Trying to make us disappear?_

_I find myself upset that you would do such a thing Jay._

_Dude, Psychotic is upset! See how weird you're being? Psychotic is upset! It wasn't so long ago you were making me swear never to leave you again! Now you want us to disappear? What the hell is going on? _

Jay sighed and dropped her head down onto her arms in defeat.

_Nothing.__ Nothing is going on. Why can't you two just leave me alone? _

_Because there's something wrong with you! __Seriously…_

_Look if you just let me be for like one hour, maybe I __could chill out!_

_Jay, you have been acting extremely strangely. _

_See? Psychotic agrees with me! And you know it had to be bad for her to notice – _

_Seriously, shut up! Both of you shut up! Just… just go away. _

Jay's outburst was followed by silence. A tense, worried silence as the other two digested this development. Jay could feel Psychotic draw back, anger perfusing her thoughts. Even her other self was taken aback, considering.

_You know what, we will leave you alone. Do whatever you want, __Psych__ and I will be back here if you need us. But tonight, when we're off shift __- team__ meeting. No, don't protest, we're having one. I'm not giving you__ a choice. _

The sensation of Jay's other self retreating was singularly odd. It wasn't actually at all what she wanted, but her other self was right. She had spent 18 years avoiding feelings and she'd always hated being in situations that elicited them. But this was something she couldn't seem to help, and being irritable at the other two… it seemed to just come with the territory.

---

The room was looking a little different this time round. There was still the utilitarian table in the centre with the ergonomic chairs, but instead of the usual chrome efficiency the furniture was a matt black. Jay in a pair of black jeans and her standard black tank top, sat in her usual position with one leg slung over the armrest of a chair, her hair tied back and her expression as neutral as she could make it.

Across the table, Jay was eyeing the black furniture with unease. In her regular gold silky skirt set, with her hair down her back she was seated in a comfortable sofa chair that was set away from the black centre furniture, near a brick fireplace that had set itself into the far wall. On the other side of the fireplace, leaning against the mantelpiece Psychotic stood in her lilac ensemble, the magic creating a muted purple aura that flickered uneasily around her. Both the girls by the fireplace were eyeing Jay at the table, neither keen on starting the subject.

Psychotic cleared her throat.

"Would you care to explain your current behavior?"

Jay just snorted, shrugging one shoulder and shifting slightly in her black chair. The other Jay frowned and leaned forward in her armchair.

"I think you're depressed, actually." The other Jay stated bluntly.

"And may I ask where you got your psychiatric degree, Dr. Jay?" Jay asked sarcastically.

The other Jay frowned. "You're thinking about just blanking out, your thoughts have been persistently black- I mean, case in point, look at what you've done to the furniture!"

"Was that supposed to be a pun?" Jay's voice dripped sarcasm.

"You are not being cooperative." Psychotic interjected a note of irritation in her voice.

"Why should I be?" Jay snapped defensively, swinging her foot off the armrest and stamping it down on the floor. "What if I'm depressed? Who wouldn't be?"

"I don't get why you think you ought to be depressed?" The other Jay asked.

"I'm useless!" Jay growled, standing up suddenly and moving behind the chair to begin pacing. "I get us into trouble and then I can't get us back out again. We just put ourselves in situations and wait around for people to save us. People, I might add, who don't particularly want us around in the first place. I mean hello- Superman had to save us the last time! Superman! He doesn't even like us! Imagine how that must have galled him!"

"I don't think it did at all." The other Jay answered. "He seems to rather accept us now. They all do."

Jay sneered. "Of course they don't. Nobody ever does."

"Well, why is this bothering you only now? I don't get it- we've gone 18 years from foster home to foster home, and you're only now depressed about nobody accepting us?"

"I… it's just… "

"You appear to have some other concern?" Psychotic asked, curiosity once again getting the better of her.

"No! I just felt really humiliated when we had to be saved like that…"

"You didn't the last time, with the radioactive trucks thing." Jay pointed out.

"Well, that time it wasn't my fault."

"It wasn't your fault this time either." Psychotic responded. "We made the decision together. And it was the right decision."

"You two don't understand! I made a fool of us, I got us into trouble. You might say it was a group decision but we all know I do the directing and I fouled up. What's to say I won't do it again?"

"Hey, everyone fouls up sometimes. We're still learning." The other Jay said reasonably.

"Yeah, but everyone's already watching, just waiting for me to mess up again. We've messed up so many times before."

"I think I must take responsibility for previous incidents." Psychotic murmured drily.

"But still, ending up in the sick bay twice in two months is pushing things a little bit, and then he, well never mind. You guys wouldn't understand."

"We are trying." Psychotic was obviously trying to maintain a tone of reason.

"He? What he?" The other Jay interrupted, honing in on the one word Jay hoped she wouldn't hear.

"He? There's no he. This is a totally female brain." Jay replied.

"You said he."

"I did not."

"Psychotic, back me up here. She said he."

"I feel perhaps we have been sidetracked."

"She said he. He in a she-brain is an interesting word, ok? Who is he?"

"Why do you have to be so one-track minded? I didn't say he! Can we get back to me being depressed?"

"Oh, now you're depressed? Back when you weren't trying to get out of explaining you were totally normal!"

"Yes I'm depressed! I'm depressed! I admit it! I feel hopeless and I have feelings of guilt and low self-worth!"

"It is good that you admit to it…"

"Psychotic, you're letting yourself be distracted from the truly interesting admission- "

"It may be more interesting, but it is less important." Psychotic said firmly, ending the other Jay's interrogation. "You admit that you are depressed Jay?"

Jay mentally breathed a sigh of relief. "Yes. I've been feeling really down lately. In the last two weeks I mean. After the moon thing. I'm sure I'll get over it, but you guys have got to back off a little bit and give me some time."

Psychotic nodded. "Perhaps we should seek help?"

"Oh that's just what we need - Psychotic in a psychiatric consultation!" Jay answered sarcastically. "No, I'll get over it. It's just… low mood, rather than depression. Yes, that's right. Low mood."

The other Jay and Psychotic eyed Jay suspiciously. Jay just concentrated on not thinking about anything.

"Ok, well, as long as you think you'll be alright."

"Yes, I think… I think we just need to make some boundaries in our head, and let each other think for ourselves once in a while." Jay concluded desperately.

The other Jay frowned. "That was a highly convoluted sentence, but I think I get it. Just… stop acting so weird."

"That was highly considerate of you, but I shall do my best." Jay responded with a hint of sarcasm. Psychotic nodded, and then with a shrug faded out, not having quite acquired the appropriate social etiquette of leave taking yet.

The other Jay just sighed and faded out.

Jay was left alone in a deserted 'meeting room' in her own mind. No doubt her other self would be surprised on returning to consciousness to find herself in charge of the body, since Jay had yet to return, but she needed a few minutes to just think while they weren't watching her like hawks.

---

I'm messed up. I know I'm messed up. I have a lifetime of being messed up as an excuse for being messed up now. Not that I'm looking to be excused, it's just that… I'm messed up. More so than my other self, who's pretty normal. Maybe not more than Psychotic, who's just weird. But I am messed up.

Nobody's ever cared about me. That's my normal. It's just me, the other me, and now Psychotic. We're in here together, and we always will be, but it's just us. Just us.

But he said it. He said it. "I do care." That's what he said. What am I supposed to think? Nobody cares, but he said he did. And he was just so angry- do people get that angry if they don't care? But nobody cares. It's just easier if nobody cares. It doesn't matter so much when they send you away.

I have to stop thinking about this! I can't think about this! If the other two heard… no! They're not going to hear. I just have to… not think. Or think about other things. This isn't important and I'll forget it. I'll forget it soon. Meanwhile I'll just have to be 'depressed.' Shouldn't be too hard. Concentrate on being depressed, and don't think. No problem.

But he said it.


End file.
